SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to What Would Amber Do with your host, Amber Howard. Each week, Amber dances in conversation with inspirational leaders, help to make a difference for what matters most to people. She brings you incredible guests who share their real life experiences of being a leader and what it looks like to live a truly created life of service to others. And now, here is your host.

SPEAKER_02 0:28

Welcome back, everyone. Welcome back to What Would Amber Do? It is my honor this morning to have on the show Jan Schiffner. Jan is a leader, author, coach, and influencer, an award-winning sales management professional. Jan is committed that people have the skills, tools, knowledge, and awareness to keep moving forward, even when faced with seeming seemingly impossible obstacles. Which, wow, isn't that an important message for today and everything that we're dealing with in the world? Jan, thank you so much for being on the show.

SPEAKER_01 1:03

Oh, Amber, thank you. It's truly an honor and a privilege to be here. I've had the pleasure of listening to you uh interact with other guests. And uh I'm just honored to be a part of it or have been asked. So thank you.

SPEAKER_02 1:19

Thank you. I uh I love actually, I think I say this on the show often. It's probably one of my favorite things I do each week, just like the space to be able to really connect to someone in a conversation and just you know, see what unfolds between two human beings. And um, I'm grateful that you want to dance with me in conversation about the things that are important to you. So tell us a little bit about what brought you, you know, how did Jan get to where she is in life today? Tell me a little bit about your journey.

SPEAKER_01 1:46

Well, it's it's been quite a journey, Amber. I um got oh well, I met a professional football player that swept me off my feet when I was 20 years old. And I uh left college and um uh some other activities I was involved in. I had planned to be a professional ski instructor and sort of chucked it all um to move to Buffalo, New York, uh, which meant I sort of lost my uh foundational support group, family, et cetera, because it was on the across the country. But I I loved it. We had a lot of fun, we met a lot of interesting people. Um I I danced with OJ. That's not the best character reference anymore, but that was part of our circle. So um he was traded to the Denver Broncos, and then um we moved to Denver. Uh eventually he was released from professional football, and we moved back to the small hometown in California where we had both grown up. And uh that was fine, um, but we no longer had the income that was associated with his uh profession, and things got very challenging for us. Um, so much so that uh it was I had to work at a job and I hadn't finished college. Um so I was kind of doing pretty uh entry-level work, and uh I was horrified at the thought that I would have to do that, something I didn't enjoy, to help keep a roof over our heads for the next 30 years. And along with financial challenges, we were just arguing a lot and at a certain and we had a beautiful son who I was now 43 that I adore. It's turned out great, in spite of the story, I'm happy to say. And um, I just didn't want him to grow up in a war zone. So I made the decision to leave, and it was not an easy decision by any means. And if I had known how hard it would be before it got better, I might have not gone that route.

SPEAKER_02 4:01

Well, you know, there are some wise words right there, right? How many of us have been in that? You know, looking back, it's like sometimes it's a good thing that we don't know, right, Jack.

SPEAKER_01 4:11

It's a good thing, Amber. It really is. Um, I I I am grateful for that journey. I mean, my journey was about learning how to become an independent, uh, successful woman in society. And uh I had my mother was the opposite. She stayed in a relationship that was uh uh challenging, but she was stoically stayed, and that was her commitment to family. And I think a lot of people make that choice and and I applaud them for it, but I I felt like I needed to do something different. I had uh inherited enough of my father's uh leadership and charisma, and I wanted to be successful in my own right. I didn't want to be attached to someone that was successful or famous. I I wanted to find my own path. But again, um without education, without uh a support system, it was it was a journey.

SPEAKER_02 5:15

You said so many things that kind of, you know, we so many things that kind of resonated there, Jan. I you know, I think a lot about you know, like just I've had some conversations with people in general about athletes and and that journey. And you know, you're so all in, right? There is, I think, in order to kind of perform at that level to be that kind of athlete, um, you have to be all in. Can't have a backup plan, right? It's like anyone who's like really out to accomplish something like that. And at the same time, we know just like based on the body that athletes have a they have a shelf life, right? It's like, so you know, I I wonder if there is more that we could do collectively to support them in that journey, right? To have it not be. But you know, I can only imagine what that was like for you as as his wife. And then for him, right? The self-worth, like your self-worth, your self-esteem, all gets so wrapped up in achieving and accomplishment. And that's kind of the model of success that we have in North America. And I think when you start to lose those things, not just the financial accomplish, you know, the financial support, but then also like, what do you where's your when your worth is coming from outside of you in terms of your accomplishment, when those accomplishments stop for whatever reason, um, it can be really damaging to the sense of self, right? So I can only imagine what that was like to go through. And and when you talked about dancing with OJ, I I just like I smile because thank God we are all not defined by our best or worst moments, right? And that is in no way to diminish what OJ did or anything like that. But no one of us is, you know, solely the worst thing that we ever do in life. And um so awesome that you danced with OJ. I'm sure that was probably at the time in your life, I'm sure that was probably quite a moment, right?

SPEAKER_01 7:14

At the time it was. I loved his wife, uh, a first wife, Marguerite. She was one of the, she looked like Whitney Houston, and she was one of the most beautiful women I had met at the time. And she was kind, and we were both from California, and we could relate to each other. And um I always wonder what she's doing now because she was really a very special person, and I'm glad that uh no harm came to her, that's for sure.

SPEAKER_02 7:42

But um I think the other thing I wanted to say was like interesting. You said, you know, like we look at pair, I think we can look at parallels and like different choices. And so, you know, your mom stayed, you left. And and I mean we if we step outside of a conversation of right, wrong, good, bad, like, you know, things worked out in both cases, right? You're extraordinary, you have an extraordinary life, you have an you know, and your son is like so. It's like you know, I I'm just present to um in change management, project management. Sometimes we have this saying, it's all okay at the end. And if it's not okay, it's not the end yet, right? So yeah, I just I'm just present to that right now. And I'm in California, actually. I just got to San Ramon last night. I'm looking out beautiful hills. I'm here visiting, and uh, this is my second time in California and I've fallen in love. It's it's beautiful here.

SPEAKER_01 8:41

Yeah it is, it's that's a gorgeous area too, Amber. Um, I I say uh, you know, when I mentioned leaving and it getting harder before it got better, I um uh had moved into a house that I could afford. Well, it was it was a room at the back of a house, and I had to go through their back fence next to their broken hot tub to get into where I was staying at the time. And I'll tell you, it was very eye-opening and it was a huge reality check. Like, what have I signed up for? You know, this is not my beautiful life, but what it gave me, Amber, was a determination to rise above my circumstances and to develop myself as a person to become more than uh what I was or where I was at that particular time. And I went through um uh several years where my parents had both passed away and my former husband's family was large, and I would give up Christmases so my son could go stay with them because I wanted him to have uh the holidays and have family. And I would sit by myself in a dark movie theater on Christmas, and um sometimes it was very, very hard. Um I really dove into uh becoming the best I could be at work so that I could expand and grow and be a better provider for my son. And uh it took a long time. Uh it was uh what one of the things that we did to kind of get out of where I was living was on the weekends we acted in a Renaissance fair in Nevado, California, not too far from where you are. And my son and I loved that. We were in pageants and parades and we could sing and dance and dress up and I made costumes, and it was a polar opposite from my reality during the week. Um, but what really hit home one time was uh we were driving uh to one of the fairs, and my car uh caught on fire, and uh pieces of it fell out behind us on the highway. And I remember getting out of the car and looking at what was left of it, and we were in our Renaissance Fair costumes, standing at the side of the road, and I was throwing dirt on the engine to make the fire go out, and tears were just pouring down my face. And I was like, how did I get here? How did how did this happen? This was not the choice that I thought I was making when I decided to uh leave my marriage. But again, I think having moments like that where you have to uh really evaluate who you are, what you are, and where you're going was a real turning point for me. And I I went back to college and I uh worked really hard at work and I made a lot of sacrifices and um it it's really paid off. But I I still remember that girl on the side of the road putting her car out in a Renaissance fair costume um with a lot of compassion.

SPEAKER_02 12:13

I mean, we make, you know, I'm present to the decisions we make in that moment. I'm very recreated by what you're sharing, you know, and and the long-term ramifications of those decisions. I, you know, I was 18. Well, I was 20 when I left my husband, uh, two small kids, and you know, and uh I had no money and way too much pride to ask for any help. You know, and if I could do it over again. That's one thing I say to my children, you know, is like if you if you take, and for anyone listening to this show, if you take any like only one more piece of wisdom from me in life, do not make your life harder than it needs to be by trying to go it alone. Allow contribution in, like you are surrounded. It's the natural state of human beings to want to contribute and support one another. And all of this caca gets in the way, but really, if you get down to the core of it, I do believe that at our core, human beings want to contribute, want to support, and we've got to allow that in, right? But I remember being like 20 years old, no money, um, no, you know, no meaningful work to support my kids. And um, you know, I made a decision in that moment that I was um I was never gonna depend on a man for financially for anything again in my life. And man, I did that for a really long time. And I was real right that I couldn't like I couldn't rely on a man financially for anything. And and that like perpetrated through my relationships with with men from that point on. And I get at the time, like we we we can look back at these things now and it's like judge them or whatever. But at the time, that's what I needed to believe, you know, in order to survive and and at those moments. Um, but I can so get that that feeling of desperation, Jan, you know, that feeling of um like hopelessness. And it's like, and that question, like, how did I get, like, how did I get here? This was not like, you know, um, and it's like I really do believe there's power in owning and being responsible for the fact that we're creating our lives, whether we're doing it by choice or or by default, right? And um, I did make choices that led me to those moments. And I also made choices that led me out of those moments as well to the place I am and the place you are today, right?

SPEAKER_01 14:38

You are so telling my story, Amber. It's just very parallel. Um, I I had uh multiple boyfriends for a while, and my son was old enough to understand what was going on. And I remember at one point I was involved with someone, and my son came up to me and just pleadingly looked in my eyes and said, Mom, can you please take him back? Can you please just take him back? And I made a very clear decision at that moment in time that the people I was bringing into my life were not enhancing it for either one of us. And that really solidified my choice of um approaching a career and education and uh personal development and uh doing everything I could to ensure that he never had to look at me and ask that question again. One of the things that uh as I got into sales, I um really found my calling. I had a lot of empathy for people and really valued what it was that they were looking for and did everything I could to put my products and services in alignment with what their needs were. And I got successful pretty quickly. Um it was all of a sudden a better ACAR. And there was ACAR. It wasn't on fire. Uh there was a nicer place to live. There were um I started meeting extraordinary people in sales. You never know who's going to be on the other side of a door when you get there. And I've had the great pleasure of working with Lucasfilm in San Ramon, uh, or up in that Bay Area. Um, uh Sears Point Raceway at the time, which now I called something else. But um I also brought on the San Jose Sharks hockey team and helped them uh in the cellular industry with cell phones for their organization as well as the players. So it was all of a sudden this immediate lift and uh excitement, enthusiasm of celebrities all around me. And it's funny because although I was married to a professional football player and he played for a few years, my life since then I've been around professional sports, um, providing them products and services, whether it's uh baseball, basketball, hockey, football, uh it's just been part of my life. And uh it's been a lot of fun to include my son in uh different events. And uh we've had a great time. And it doesn't surprise me at all that he now is in the financial industry and works with the community and is so um uh so good at what he does because he had so many experiences meeting different types of people throughout my career that it's just blossomed for his. And I'm very proud of him. Uh he has his MBA now, and I know my going back to school helped uh inspire him with that. He has a beautiful family and their dream home. And uh I'm very proud of the sacrifices I made early on so that he could turn out as well as he has.

SPEAKER_02 18:01

Yeah, you know, when you talked about um when you talked about, you know, giving up Christmases with your son so that he could have that experience of family. And, you know, I'm present to the choices that we make as parents and as human beings, but especially as parents, um, you know, with the best of intentions, right? Like because we've got some commitment that we're looking to fulfill on, even if it means um, even if it means that we go without or or and then uh yeah, so I just really want to acknowledge you, Jan, for for for standing in in, you know, your commitment to your son and that he gets uh the kind of life that that you're really committed to. You know, I know that for myself, that was a real driver for a long time. And it wasn't necessarily like, you know, we talk about, and one of the things that I know you talk about is this idea that we're either moving forward or we're we're moving backwards, right? There, and Bob Proctor, who died recently, I was uh participated in his celebration of life on the weekend. Uh, because you know, I learned a lot from his training. And and I know we're both very passionate about ongoing learning in life. And um, but Bob Proctor was famous for saying the same thing like human beings think they're being stagnant or comfortable, or but you're either moving closer to the things that you want or further away from them. And um like so I just really acknowledge you for being the kind of person who um, you know, stood in what you believed was the right choice to make for your son at the time, no matter what that meant for you. And um it's funny, I have like we haven't been able to do it the last couple. I'm really hoping we can do it this Christmas. I usually have an open house on Christmas Day uh because my mom, like, you know, there's a lot of trauma in my family, and and so it was always important for my mom when we were growing up that no one be without a family to be with on Christmas Day. Um and so because kids, you know, go back and forth, and I I often, you know, my my brother would be with my sister-in-law's family on Christmas Day, I I started doing this open house so that, you know, because I I never wanted, I never wanted someone to be sitting alone in a movie theater without anywhere to be on Christmas Day, you know. Like, no, I get sometimes people want to be alone on Christmas Day, and that's fine. But for people who didn't want to be alone and for whatever reason, you know, their family wasn't there or they, you know, no longer with us, I I never want people to then I'm so I'm I'm really looking forward to and hoping that come Christmas this year I'll be able to open my doors again to whoever needs a family or wants a family to be with or wants to be with my zany wacky family on Christmas this year.

SPEAKER_01 20:47

Love that. That is so generous of you, Amber. And um the people that pick me up when my car caught on fire. Um, uh Bill and uh Penny Morrison do that have that same wonderful tradition where they open their home and they call it an orphan's dinner, and all of their friends that are orphans get to go and be a part of their family during the holidays, and they've done it forever. And I think it is so generous and um understanding, kind that not everyone has um a huge family to turn to and uh to be able to be a part of someone else's is is can be very, very helpful at times. This year I'm happy to say my my son has uh married, he married a beautiful girl from Italy. Um part of her family was actually able to fly over this year for Christmas. So my home was just bursting at the seams with love and food and friends and family. And I got to look around and say, wow, it was all worth it. To your point, you know, what got me here wasn't easy, but look at this. And I have a granddaughter that is the light of my life, and she's my reward for. Or anything and everything that I've ever been through. And I really got to, I've gotten to spend at least two days a week with her since she was born nine years ago. And she is my sole sister, Amber. We um have more fun and giggles and laughs than uh I could have ever thought were possible. And you know, uh it all if it ends well, it it was worth it. And some of the best books I've ever read were never, you know, they had a perfect life all the way through it. There were ups and downs and challenges that help make um the rewards um all the sweeter. And and that's truly how I I feel about life now. It's just sweet. So um and I've and it hasn't been easy. I've gone through uh I had COVID, I had cancer, I've had, I lost a house. But you know what? Um wherever I've lived, it's been a house where my son's friends have always felt validated and comfortable and fun. And uh while a lot of his friends had very financially successful parents, they all seemed to gather at my house because I enjoyed them so much. So um life is good now. Life is so good.

SPEAKER_02 23:18

It's so great. Uh, you know, you're talking about those stories that you know, the the best stories are the ones that have some twists and turns. It's I I want them to work out in the end, though. I I am like, you know, if I'm if I'm like escaping into a movie or a television show or something or a book, it's like I want the Hollywood ending. Like I don't want this, like, no, the terrorist gets away with it and you know the bad guy wins. Like I want it to, I want it to all work out in the end. This is why Jane Austen, Jane Austen is like my go-to, right? Because no matter what happens between the couple and the twists and turns and the ups and downs, and the at the end, that couple that you want to get together, like they win and the romance wins, right?

SPEAKER_01 24:03

Amen. You know, it's um uh one of the things I think that another sort of chapter of my life, and there have been quite a few different ones, is that my parents had been through uh World War II, and so they were very conservative with their finances and they stayed very close to home, and their home was very important to them, which I think we're all starting to learn more and more about after COVID, about making whatever our environment is something that's very special because we've spent a lot more time there than we did a couple of years ago. But um uh because they did, and I was all I have always hungered to travel, and so um at this point I'm delighted to say I've been to 12 countries. I can't get enough of it. I'm looking forward to getting back out, uh going to Europe this summer again, uh, because certainly there was a hiatus on any type of traveling during um COVID, but I love culture, meeting new people, new cultures. Um, I have such a uh I think one of the reasons I honestly got well was uh when I got ill, um I had friends all over the planet that were praying for me, uh all different kinds of nationalities and religions. I had people in Bethlehem, people in Hong Kong, people in Africa, and I was like, you know, that that's pretty wonderful that I have that representation to um on my behalf uh ask for me to be able to continue this extraordinary journey. And I'm healthier and happier than ever. I I just was a part of this book project that we did, and uh I can't wait to see what's next because I just feel like any with good health, anything is possible and uh with family to support me. Um uh I've already won. I anything now is just frosting on a on a well-layered cake.

SPEAKER_02 25:59

So tell me a little bit more about the book project. So you your book's coming out in April?

SPEAKER_01 26:06

It is. It's um women who lead too. And what I love about it is um uh the curator uh has um been able to collect stories from uh women who lead from all over the world. And uh she did that successfully in volume one, which I believe you were a part of. I was, I was, I was, I was.

SPEAKER_02 26:25

Yes, shout out to our lovely Istahar, who uh and uh our fellow friend Monica who uh introduced Jan and I to one another. And yeah, no, it was an incredible experience.

SPEAKER_01 26:37

And I'm honored to be uh on board for volume two. And uh I listened to your story uh last night again, Amber, and I'm so moved by your personal journey and and your uh uh rise to stardom and um all the great things that are ahead for you as well. So congratulations.

SPEAKER_02 26:59

Thank you. You know, I um I pushed send, and it's so funny. You know, I shared this on Facebook this week. I pushed send on probably the biggest email of my life this week in terms of a project and and um the potential impact that it's gonna have for people. And um, you know, I wanted to throw up, Jan, like, you know, like before pushing the email, the send, I was like, can I do this? Like what uh like the fear of failure, right? Because the more we, you know, I think back to it, right? Like, you know, some of the things that we've been talking about on our journey, like for the longest time, you know, I remember being in university and and I was, you know, I had three, like I had Mel Kayla and Matthew, my two kids, and for a good chunk of it, I had my stepson as well. And then I was pregnant with my youngest son in my last year of school. And, you know, I'd meet people and they'd be like, I don't know how you're doing it, you know. Like I like, because I was taking like, you know, between three and five full courses at a time to get my degree done. I I've completed my degree in five years. And um, and people would be like, I don't know how you're doing it. I can't take care of my fish. And at the time I was like, Nike, just do it. Because I think when you're in it, right? And I I I know you can relate to this from what you shared, like when you're in the like the bowels of it, right? And and what I was gonna say earlier that I forgot is like, you know, you talk about having a like a a reason to keep moving forward. For the longest time, mine came from a negative space. And I've said this like it was like I screwed up, not screwed up having my kids young, because it wasn't that, you know, it it was bringing them into the circumstances that I brought them into and feeling like I had failed, you know, like I had messed up and I had to fix it. And and even though that wasn't coming from a positive, you know, right now I take action from like I'm here to fulfill on a purpose and I'm really clear about what that is. And and so there's like a really powerful intention behind who I am in the world, but you don't want to mess with the power of like a mama bear who is like out to protect and provide for her kids, right? There is some very powerful, um, like there's a fire there, and there was for a long time, but it was so much in survival that it was just like you took the action because that's all there was to do. But and so it's interesting contrasting that now as I'm, you know, coming from a different place and in a different place, and and that fear of failure, the bigger the games get, the bigger the fear of failure is, right? Whereas back then, like I can see it was just so much survival. There was no thought of failure. I think you were kind of once you get to bottom, right? It's like, I mean, I guess there is always somewhere further you can fall, but it doesn't feel that way at the top. You don't want to know about it though. It doesn't feel that way, right? It's like, oh, I'm at that, this is like the bottom. It can't get any worse than this. So it just keeps stepping forward. Um, and so I am grateful that I'm no longer living in survival. And at the same time, it's like um I I love, I think Monica was the one who said it, close your eyes and hit send, right? Like just like and and for anyone listening to us and listening to this conversation, like take that the invitation to take that on in life. Like just close your eyes and hit send on whatever it is that's important to you, right? I love that.

SPEAKER_01 30:22

Nothing ventured, nothing gained. And um uh I I think once we learn to sort of fly without the safety net, it is when it gets really um uh rewarding and and uh exciting. Um, you know, I can't wait to see what the next step is, and I'm really not afraid of anything anymore, you know. So I know I'm gonna get through it because I've been there, I've done that. Um, I know I have what it takes inside of myself to survive, and and I will. And I I do really believe that. And um uh I'm I the joy that has come as a result of this journey is uh almost unexplainable, but there's a satisfaction uh that uh I've gotten through this, that my son is has done well, that my granddaughter's well on her way, and uh life is uh I who knows what's ahead and I I can't wait.

SPEAKER_02 31:28

There's like you know, hearing you're sharing like this, the the resilience, right? And um I spoke at the summit this week and it talked about thriving through uncertainty and and I know that this is something, you know, strategies for surviving, like it is important, you know, up an important part of your message. I didn't know I was resilient, you know, at the time, right? Like it's like only in hindsight now with the tools and the knowledge and the skills that I have that I can see that wow, like man, but that like confidence, that knowing, like when you've gone through it in the in the way that that you and I have, and you know, there is like a confidence, a deep, deep, profound sense of self that like no matter what life throws at me, you know, I I'm gonna be able to manage that. I'm gonna be able to, and then and then thank God, you know, we we do the work that we do, that we no longer, you know, attract to us the circumstances that need us to have to be quite so resilient, right?

SPEAKER_01 32:34

And and there is something, I mean, I start my day now every morning um tuning in to um the god of my understanding. And I'm outside feeding squirrels and birds and walking in my yard and just expressing gratitude for everything in my life. And uh I'm a real believer that I have to keep that important connection, that positivity, that sense of wonder and and gratitude in order for it to continue. Uh I really believe I have to be grateful for what I have before uh anything else comes into my life in order to appreciate it fully and uh to be a custodian for whatever is sent into my life. Uh I want the universe to know I'll take good care of it. So uh that's that's very important to me too.

SPEAKER_02 33:26

That's beautiful. I am a mentor of mine and a good friend would always say, you know, um, grateful yet dissatisfied. You know, so I'm like profoundly grateful for what I have and yet dissatisfied because there's more I want to contribute and a greater impact that I want to have. And that was very powerful when I got that because for a long time I wasn't grateful at all because I wasn't enough and nothing was enough. And you know, I just couldn't, it didn't matter. Um and then I developed, I think, you know, um a gratitude practice. And I I really do for myself, I think that was probably one the game changer in terms of like, you know, really getting like getting responsible for like the abundance that I had in my life around me that I couldn't see when I was coming from this this internal dialogue about about being enough or not. And um and over time, it does, you know, new new neural pathways get created. I I can be grateful for all of it now. Like even the stuff that doesn't go the way that I want it to. I I can really be grateful for that. And because I'm really clear uh that everything in my life is unfolded in in the way that it has, so that I could get to where I am today and be someone who's able to impact other people in the way that I say that I want to and that I'm committed to based on why I believe I was created.

SPEAKER_01 34:59

I love that. That's just very profound. You know, gratitude and um forgiveness have been big in my journey, forgiving everyone in my life. And what I'm really working on now is not just forgiving, but forgetting. You know, I don't I don't want to be held hostage by negativity or thoughts or doubts. And I really have come to believe that whatever is taking place is going to work out for the ultimate, can be used for good, or will work out for good in my life if I just uh don't judge it too harshly or if I just uh go along with it. I don't have to um uh be angry or upset with people anymore. I I know that whatever journey we're on together, it's going to work out for the best interest of all. And whenever I haven't gotten something, in hindsight, I can look back and say, I'm so glad I didn't get that. And it was so important to me, and now I understand why it didn't happen. Uh, then again, I uh I think because um uh I'm open to uh receiving and and finding out even more what that's all about, that uh if I can maintain a very positive, upbeat, open, receptive attitude, that more is going to come my way. And I I I can't wait. I can't wait.

SPEAKER_02 36:27

And you know, that idea of being one of the things that you said that really like stood out for me. Um, you've said so many beautiful things this morning, Jan, um, is this idea of being a cons being a custodian. And I'm like, now I want to go look in my life, right? At like where where am I being that, where am I not? Um, you know, because I think there's always an opportunity for for each of us to really continue to level up and just keep looking at like, where am I being my commitment in my life, where am I being, you know, my my values and and the things that I say uh are important. And um yeah, so thank you for that contribution. Because I think you're right, you know, uh my the same mentor, the one who talked about being grateful yet dissatisfied, would always say, like, um, money goes where it's wanted and stays where it's, you know, like where it's valued, right? Like, you know, and it's it's all energy. I I really do believe that it's all energy and and and we have to be able to and willing to keep the flow of energy moving, whether it's contribution, money, um whatever it is that it that it is that we want in our lives. But you know, money comes in, it goes out, it it it's gotta flow. And um yeah, so there's like that's a new access for me to to kind of a new language, uh, which I think is very powerful. You know, where perhaps where am I not being a custodian for my blessings?

SPEAKER_01 38:01

That's amazing, Amber. I um I really believe in giving back now, too. That's so important to me, um, whether it's people that work with me, for me, or my community. Um, I was very involved recently with a food drive for an organization called Hopelink, and uh was able to rally some troops with the organization I currently uh work for. And we were able to collect almost half a ton of food for their food banks uh during two food drives during December and January. And I think for me, there's something about you mentioned wanting to nurture feed people. I I have to feed things. It's I want to make sure everybody's fed. So I can't, I can't truly bear the thought of any child having to worry about food or hunger. That just I can't. So um because I can't go there, I I want to do whatever I can to ensure that um no child ever goes hungry. And uh we think that because we live here, I think a lot of times we think we have to go to other countries to help people where even in Bellevue, Kirkland, there are children that don't have all the food they need. And when school ends, their primary source of a of a meal was at school. And summer can be very challenging. So I'm going to do another drive this summer to ensure that these food banks are full and that um the families can go there and and get what they need so that um no one ever has to be anxious about where their next meal is going to come from.

SPEAKER_02 39:41

Well, beautifully said. And um, you know, I also I've I didn't mention this earlier, but I wanted to thank you for like your context around being a salesperson. Because I, you know, I know and I've I've talked to many entrepreneurs about this, and I know for myself as I've you know shifted from working for other people's businesses to working for myself, like we've got some wonky stuff going on about sales as human beings, right? But like if we really do get that people have needs and wants and desires, and if we're really coming from listening for what those people want and need and desire, and not from like trying to force them to have something that we want them to have, but like we're actually as people who provide good services and products, that we're here to um have them fulfill in the things that matter to them. And the way we do that, part of the way that we have people fulfill on what's not important to them is through selling them things.

SPEAKER_01 40:41

And I think it's so uh such an important mindset shift. It's about how how can my product or service uh provide value to uh people that are looking for it versus uh I'm just gonna sell them something or do a song and dance so that they want to buy. It's it's a very different place. And I know I've heard Monica say that that you know she just shows up being the very best that she can be for her customers so that they would never consider going anywhere else because they know the very best value is with her. And that is something I've always tried to emulate. And with the people that work for me now, um, I I always try to set them up to be the most extraordinary, best human beings they can be, best future leaders. Um, I want that to be a living legacy. So um with them and they are.

SPEAKER_02 41:40

I love that. And I love that you said um, you know, like living, you know, a living legacy. I think that's really like because one of my core values is legacy as well. And I think, but it's like it's not something out there someday, one day, you know, it's like, am I living my like my legacy life now? Right. And uh so I think that's a perfect place to stop. Jan, thank you so much. You know, just I really want to honor and acknowledge you for every step that you took to get to where you are today, even the ones that were really hard and you didn't want to take them and you took them anyway. Uh, thank you for being someone, you know, my commitment is that people get to live a created life of their own design based on what they really want and that they never have to be stuck with anything. And so thank you for being out in life and a demonstration of that as you live your legacy today. And uh just thank you for coming here this morning and and sharing yourself and the things that are important to you with us.

SPEAKER_01 42:37

Thank you, dear Amber. It's been an honor and a pleasure, and and thank you for this extraordinary work that you do and getting these wonderful messages out into the world, particularly during this challenging time. So thank you.

SPEAKER_02 42:50

Wonderful. For everyone listening to the episode, you'll be able to connect with Jan in the show notes. And just thank you so much for being part of this conversation with us. Until next week. Bye, everyone. Bye.

SPEAKER_00 43:03

Thank you so much for joining us for this week's episode. For more information on the show and our extraordinary guests, check out what wouldamberdo dot com.