Welcome to What Would Amber Do with your host, Amber Howard. Each week, Amber dances in conversation with inspirational leaders, how to make a difference for what matters most to people. She brings you incredible guests who share their real life experiences of being a leader and what it looks like to live a truly created life of service to others. And now, here is your host.

Welcome back, everyone. Welcome back to What Would Amber Do? It is my honor. I'm recording from California tonight, and it's my honor to be here in Huntington Harbor with the fantastic Jude Charles. Jude is the CEO, author, and expert filmmaker who helps, well, right now he does anyway, entrepreneurs leverage their power of storytelling to scale their businesses. Jude has defied the odds at every step of the way, starting his entrepreneurialship journey at the age of 17. Jude's commitment is to lead and empower entrepreneurs to have relentless courage. Jude, thank you so much for being here today. Such a gift to have you on the show.

Amber, thank you for having me. It is um I'm looking forward to the conversation we're having or going to have because uh one thing I've enjoyed about talking with you in the few conversations we've had is you're a deep person like I am. It's not on the surface. And so I'm really looking forward to this conversation tonight.

Well, thank you for that. I too have enjoyed uh connecting with you, and I'm looking forward to you know what we're gonna discover here in this conversation together and share with other people. So why don't you like kick us off with, you know, I mean, entrepreneur starting your first business at 17. What's the journey been like to get to today, Jude?

It has been a winding river. Um, I started the business at 17. I am the youngest of 10 children. I had absolutely no idea what I was doing. But my teacher, Mrs. Donnelly, uh, she was my TV production teacher. She taught me everything she knew about video production. And then on May 4th, 2006, told me that I should start a business. May 5th, 2006, she walks into the classroom with a yellow envelope. And inside of this yellow envelope is my first set of business cards. But the first five years of starting this business was me trying to understand what it means to be an entrepreneur. Um I didn't know how to sell myself. I struggled to make $20,000 a year, and it wasn't until a client, uh Keisha Dior, who I had been working with for a year, she had been selling cosmetics, um, started her business from the ground up. And there was a day that she called me. I was I happened to be sitting on the edge of my bed that day, and she calls. Now I'm sitting on the edge of my bed because I'm thinking about quitting and giving up. Because that morning I woke up and a tow truck driver was outside repossessing my car for the second time in eight months. But I get this phone call from Keisha, and Keisha tells me she's made one million dollars from her company, but also from partially a documentary that we had created together of her company growing from the ground up. And it was at that point that I realized I had something valuable. That's five years in. Today, as I talk to you, I'm 16 years in business. And we talked about it off-air, but I will be retiring at the end of this year, semi-retiring, as we're recording this is 2022, but in 2026, completely walking away from the business. Whether I sell it or just close it down completely, completely walking away. And it's been a winding river because I started at 17 having no idea where this would take me. I knew it would never be the end game, but I knew that I was talented and I wanted to be a good steward of the gift that I had been given. And so now, almost 20 years later, I'm looking at what's next. What is chapter two?

I love that. And thank you to your teacher for, you know, I think it's the power of, I mean, let's just acknowledge the power of teachers, right? Like to see and create a future for someone. And and and I think they're some of the earliest people in our life outside of perhaps our parents. And for some of us, our parents aren't able to gift us that that belief in us. So for some of us, our the first people in our life, this the first source of real faith um, you know, inside of another human being comes from our educators. So, you know, just really want to acknowledge your teacher for not just saying, oh, I think you should do this, but taking, you know, the action of creating those business cards and in doing so creating a future for you to live into, you know, and and I get it. It's interesting. As you were talking about like the journey to discover being an entrepreneur, one of the things that just came to me in that moment, Jude, was like, I think there's this like thing that we do where we try to emulate and be entrepreneur, you know, be an entrepreneur. Like there's like like being an entrepreneur is some object or some suit that you could put on, you know, like being a CEO of a company or a lawyer or a doctor, as if it's this thing. And and, you know, if you learn the right things or you read the right books or you surround yourself or listen to the right people, like if I listen to Steve Jobs enough or Richard Branson or or whatever, then all of a sudden one day I'm gonna, you know, I'm gonna have an apple or a virgin or whatever. And I I actually don't think it's like that at all. I actually think it's like like anyone who's been really successful as an entrepreneur is a unique being that has found a way and and done the work to express that uniqueness in the world, just like you've done, right? And and and it takes time, I think, sometimes to find our own voice. And there's a lot of falling flat on our face. And uh, you know, it's funny because people will call me an entrepreneur and I don't even know that that's what I am, right? I'm just like a human being who's here to serve and looking for different ways to fulfill all my purpose. And it just so happened at one point in time, the best way to fulfill all my purpose was to start my own business so that I could, you know, I could manage my own time and and find do the work that I wanted to do versus at that moment doing the work that other, you know, that I was doing for other people. And I still serve other clients. But um I I just love that. That I just like, huh? What is this thing that we call entrepreneur? And in is it really like are there, you know, I I think there are probably qualities that many successful entrepreneurs or successful people have in common. But I I wonder if there is such a thing as being an entrepreneur, like an object.

You know, I so I have a good friend Jason, who's also my business partner, and he struggles with the same thing. He struggles with the idea of what does it mean to be an entrepreneur? Because I always say to him, he's an entrepreneur. And he always he's just like, no, but I'm not like you, right? So I am very entrepreneur, and what he means by that is I'm very entrepreneur in the sense that I can look at the thing that I do, which is video production, it's a creative skill, right? I can look at that very black and white. I am not tied to the art. Like, of course, I want to do a great film and I want to tell a great story, but I'm not tied to that. What I'm tied to am I making money? Because, in my opinion, to have a business means that your business is profitable. Now, I talked about how I started the first five years. The biggest transition I made was that I was just in love. Like if I could wake up every morning and just do that thing, that's all that mattered. It wasn't about the money so much. But to be entrepreneurial, to really take on the idea of growing a business, and that that's the full gamut. You don't have to be a millionaire to be a successful entrepreneur, in my opinion. That's not success. But to be entrepreneurial means you look at this thing objectively. It's not, yes, you're you're giving of yourself, you're serving. We all are in every form or fashion. Steve Jobs was serving all the way down to me today. I'm serving, I'm serving by being on this podcast. But it, I think to me, to be an entrepreneur, you have to look at it outside of the thing that you do. You're serving, but you are, especially if you're for if you're in a for-profit business, you're serving in order to make money. Like that is that is that is the byproduct of service. Whether you're in a service-based business or a product-based business, if your product doesn't deliver on the promise, no one else will buy from you. If your service doesn't deliver on the promise, no one will buy. If your podcast, what would Amber do didn't deliver on the promise of being a good podcast that people will listen to, a great conversation that people will listen to, insightful conversations, they would not come back. So to be entrepreneurial, in my opinion, means to be a capitalist. It is your purpose in some form. It is not the purpose, but a part of your purpose is to make an income, to make revenue in order to be able to serve more people. Otherwise, it doesn't exist. Amber does not exist without the move that you're making now. I'm not sure if you talked about it on the podcast, but the move that you're making now requires income and money.

Yes. Yes, it does.

Right? So anyway, I think we're all I think when you are running a business where you are trading money, it becomes more than just transaction, it becomes transformation, but it still requires that money portion of it, which makes you entrepreneurial. As you continue to grow, as you continue to transform and change, that's what makes you entrepreneurial. You're understanding what it takes to go from I have this gift, how do I make money from this gift? And continue to do that every day for other people. Um, yeah, to me, that's what it means to be an entrepreneur.

I like, I like what you're saying. And I think one of the things that you said that really resonated with me is that you're fulfilling on your promise, right? Because it's to me like a promise is generational language, right? Like in in it just in merely in the act of declaring a promise, something becomes like um gets created in the world that didn't exist before the promise was made, right? And and so I think as as I mean, any business, whether it's like a you know, like a massive corporation or not, right? We were watching, I mean, not to not to have this all be about, you know, Apple and stuff, but we were watching my partner does a lot of work with small, medium-sized enterprises with their IT. And he does, you know, a lot of his his um clients use Apple products. And so he's he always watches their quarterly release. And um, and it's funny because they started the quarterly uh quarty quarterly release in storytelling specific to the Apple Watch and how the Apple Watch has been saving lives. And so they had a number of people tell the story of how the device saved their life. And my daughter was commenting on it and she felt it was manipulative. And I'm like, but that's it's part of the promise of the brand. And it's part, you know, like it's part of the people who are, you know, who procure Apple's products, that's part of what they expect from that brand. And so it, and I think this is true for any of us, for any of us, um, is like, are you being true to your, like, are you keeping your promises to yourself, right? Inside of what you're you exist for and your purpose, are you you operating in a way that's aligned with the like your values? But then like, are the commitments that you're making to others aligned with that as well? And are you tending to that and in everything that you do, whether it's the you know, customer service or the phone call or even the way you treat, you know, because one of the things that I could be responsible for, and it was interesting as I was going through my papers to come to move and like looking at stuff, I was part of a I did the self-development course once. And in it they asked you to interview people in your life, right? So, like inside of this conversation of keeping promises, like, are you are you are you congruent everywhere in your life? And there was a point I wasn't. And I remember like it was reread this interview I did with my daughter where she was like, What are your strengths? What are your weaknesses? What can we count on you for? What we can't, what can we never count on you for? And it was hard to hear at the time, but one of the things that my daughter said that she never could never count on me for was me being my word to my kids. Because, like, and and that I would come that they would get the worst parts of me because I'd give the best parts of myself to everyone else. And then who they would get at the end of the day was like mom who'd work 16 hours or mom who was exhausted and frustrated or whatever, right? So it's like I I love this conversation of promise inside of a creation because it's like, yeah, are you like, and and we, you know, you mentioned that you're retiring at the age of 34, which I think is freaking cool. Um, but and I know from the other conversations that you and have this is inside of a promise, right? This is inside of a commitment to yourself to be like to live your own brand and this like that entrepreneurs get to live and have relentless courage. Well, it's like if you can't be that for yourself in your own life, then how can you actually be a stand that other people have that, right?

Yeah, I so the thing that comes to mind for me is being a good steward. I uh in 2020, I burnt out in my career. So I already mentioned I've been doing this for 16 years. In 2020, it was uh 14 years. And I woke up one morning and I physically could not move. I was paralyzed, like my eyes opened, but my teeth were clenched, my heart was racing, and I had no idea what was going on. When I was finally able to get out of bed two hours later, I called my therapist because I I clearly understood this wasn't physical as much as it was mental. And it was then that I was diagnosed with burnout. But what that started for me was a journey of is this business, this thing that I've created, is it serving me in this season? The reason that that comes to mind for me is because you mentioned your your daughter said um she couldn't count on you when you by the time you got home because you would give to others and not to yourself. Well, the business, an entrepreneurial journey is meant to serve, right? You're you want to serve others, but it should also serve you. This business that I had created, this video production business, Drew Charles and Company, was no longer serving me in its current form. I had burnt out because the pandemic happened, 2020, and I had worked through the 2008 recession, thinking to myself, okay, 2008, I didn't I knew what it was like not to make six uh for six months not to make a dollar. 2020, I thought the same thing would happen. It this is a pandemic, this has never happened before, and the world had shut down. Well, I was blessed enough that it didn't happen. My clients continued working, which means I was one of only five people on a plane while everyone else stayed home. I started to build resentment towards that because I couldn't get time off. I was trapped in a way. This business no longer served me, and that's when I begin this journey of I am going to retire in five years. Right. Fast forward to 2022. Still coming out of burnout. What came with the burnout was depression and anxiety. So still coming out of all of that, and I'm looking at this this uh mission statement, this vision and mission statement that I created December of 2021 that says my mission and purpose as a person, as a human being, is to lead and empower entrepreneurs to have relentless courage. And here I am making a five-year plan not to walk away from something I know I need to walk away from. Not that I want to, but that I need to. Because it no longer serves me in this current form. So am I being a good steward of, you've mentioned it already, core values. Am I being a good steward of my vision? Because just the same way that I had begun to operate out of fear in 2020 when I burnt out, in some ways I'm still operating out of fear. Because I'm like, wait, I built this for 16 years. It's making one thing's for sure, it's making good money. I live a comfortable life. I take two months off every year. So it's making good money. I have a team that supports me in this business that I'm doing, but it's is it serving me? And to me, that's what courage looks like is to do the thing that feels most uncomfortable, but you know you need to do it. Right? Like it's not something that you want to do or something that sounds good to do. You need to do it in order to survive, in order to live your truth. And to me, that's what it means to be a good steward. That's what it means to deliver on the promise. Even when other people, like you said, um I think you said your daughter was just like, this feels disingenuous. It feels like they're manipulating people. No, it's delivering on the promise. They're being a good steward of the product that they created, which was the Apple Watch. And I'll be, I don't know what they showed. I didn't watch the um the live premiere of the Apple Watch and all the other things that they did this week, but one thing I have watched in the past is this commercial that Apple Watch has for um for their product, the Apple Watch. It's the 911 commercial, and you're hearing all these 911 calls of people saying how that like they're making a call from their Apple Watch. And to be honest with you, I have an Apple Watch that has cellular service and never even thought about this could save my life until I watched that commercial, until I heard that story, right? Or three stories, it's a combination of three stories, but the delivering on this being a good steward by creating a great product that delivers on their promise. It's not about wearing a watch on your wrist like every other watch. This is about saving your life. So that yeah, that is to me what makes the biggest difference. Can you be a good steward of the promise that when you look at your core values? Like I have five core values. Am I still living those core values out? Like you did when you went back and looked at the stories and the questions that you asked about your strengths and weaknesses. Are you still living that out?

I am I'm thinking, and as you're sharing, I'm present to my journey, you know, right now that I'm on, right? Like I'm in California until the 18th, and then moving to uh Bali. And, you know, there have been moments over the last couple of weeks. It's not like I have a bad life in Canada, you know. Like I get to do work that I really love. I'm making a difference in the world. I, you know, I have great, like I'm surrounded by extraordinary people and my children and my mom, and and there's all of these incredible, you know, the people who love me, who I love, relationships that that I've built and nurtured. And and of course, when you're going away from something, all of that stuff is right in your face, right? So you're really present to it because everyone's like, ah, you know, we don't want you to, whatever, right? And um, and there were moments where I don't know that was so much doubt, because I'm you know, I'm one of those people that when I kind of make my mind up about something, and you know, I'm kind of an all-in person. So, and and I really do believe that um my friend Ida, she's incredible. She always says your, she uses the F word, which I'm not gonna use, but she always says your heck yeah is never gonna lead you into like a hole, right? Like as long as you're following your hell yeah, your heck yeah, however you want to phrase that, like you're never gonna end up in a ditch. And so, like to me, the work that I'm gonna be doing in Bali, the difference that I'm clear it's gonna make for humanity, like that is aligned with my purpose. That is why I was created, that's what I'm here for. And so, like following that, and I believe because I've seen that when I do that, it it expands life, not just for me, but for all of the people around me. So this move isn't just about me. But there've and there've been moments where it's like like the I I couldn't even language it. Um, and so I did a collage on the weekend because I find that's a good way of like being able to express emotion that I can't always like, like when I can't always access the language of it. Um, but it's like, what does this feel like? And um, so I can see it visually, but it's like I think when you talk about having relentless courage, it's those moments, right? Where it's like, I'm just gonna lean it and I'm just gonna, you know, I'm gonna, and and what's new for me in all of it is in the past I would have just soldiered on, I would have denied the emotions, I would have ignored them, I would have like worked through them, I wouldn't have allowed myself to release them. And now I get to just kind of let them wash over me like waves in the ocean. It's like, yep, like there's some, there's some grief happening here. Yep, but like driving in my car down the road, and like the people in the other cars might wonder why this woman is sobbing alone in a car. Because that's just like, you know, the and it was such a great Jude, it was such a great exercise in being present because my brain kept wanting to take me to the airport when I was gonna be leaving and saying goodbye to my loved ones. And the minute I started to go there, it was like almost like I had to dissociate that the pain and the heartbreak. And then I was like, you're not there right now, you're here, and you've got four more days. So like be present and enjoy this moment, even whatever this moment looks like. So such a great exercise. Um, and that's one of the things, to be honest, I'm really looking forward to about being in Bali, because there's something about life there. It has you, like by definition, the place like there's the The same safety standards, there's holes in the road, driving, like you have you just like the environment calls for being more present, and you want to be more present in your life, I find there. So I'm really looking forward to that. But I I a hundred percent agree with you. And I I think it like when you've got a successful business and you're saying no, like, and and my friend Chris says, like, pursue the things that like like are a 10 out of 10 in terms of pleasure and desire. There's a million ways to fulfill on your mission and vision. Let's be honest. Like, you know, and if you actually get down to the core of what you like, if you're super clear on what your mission and vision are, why you're here, what God used, what's sourceful for you created you to fulfill on, there's probably a million plus ways to do that. But what are the ones that bring you pleasure and joy? And have you want to get out of bed in the morning? And and maybe this is why that question of what do I want now and now and now is so important, and being in that inquiry, because that for 16 years or 14 years, doing video production was the thing, the expression of that vision or your purpose that brought you pleasure and was a 10 out of 10. You know, for the most part, maybe some days it wasn't always a 10 out of 10, but but now it's not. And being willing to not be attached to that thing you created and to release it in whatever way that looks, that is that's power and that's freedom.

For a while I was attached to it. I was attached to it because it was my identity. And I didn't understand in the beginning, so I'm not gonna act like I had all the answers. But when I created this at 17, it's all I knew. I spent the majority of my adulthood creating this baby that I wasn't willing to let go. Even five years in, even when I thought of letting it go, I continued, right? And it was only after the burnout that I started to realize, yeah, I didn't want to wake up and do it in every every morning. And I didn't know why. But like you, I tried to be present and intentional. I started going to therapy and really asking the tough questions. And I think the biggest thing that came out of it is that I no longer wanted to do, which is what video production was for me. It was a thing that I could do, I wanted to be. So who am I? Who am I now, Jude Charles? At the time I was 31, 32. Who am I? And and it means who am I outside of the work that I do? When I show up, no matter if it's to work, to church, home, to a friend's event, who am I? Right? And I think that's the toughest question to ask yourself. And even now, as I do consulting sessions with with um people who are like looking to use their story in their business, the one question I always ask is why you. If someone's going to hire you and do business with you, why you? What makes you different? And it's not the thing that you do that makes you different. We don't hire or buy products based off of things, we hire them based off, we buy them because of depending on who the leader is or who the person is that created the thing. And so, yeah, it's it's having the courage to say this is no longer the way that I want to fulfill my mission and purpose. Now, here's the thing it's not, I don't regret the last 16 years because it was a part of the journey. Life is a journey. The move that you're making now to Bali is a part of your journey. It doesn't mean that everything before it didn't matter or everything before it was a mistake or any of that. It was part of the journey. It was part of the moment in your life that mattered to get you to where you are today, the experiences that you've had. 2014, I went to a leadership conference. Now we talked in the beginning about entrepreneurship and how words are um, you know, the for me, leadership I always knew was important, but I didn't understand the word of like what it meant to be a leader. Same thing with entrepreneurship. When I first started at 17, I didn't know what it meant to meant to be an entrepreneur. I had no guidance for that. Well, in 2014, I went to a leadership conference, and at this leadership conference in Spokane, Washington, um, it was an amazing three days. Bunch of people coming on stage talking about what it means to be a leader in different forms. And then I decided, okay, I've just digested all of this. I live in South Florida, which is the furthest southeast point of America, and I was in Spokane, Washington. Washington State is in the furthest northwest point of America. I was like, I'm gonna take a Greyhound bus from northeast from northwest to southeast. Never I was like, it's never gonna happen again. Let me just try it. And it was the dumbest decision I've made. Um 25 years old. I was miserable, miserable. And I turned off my phone the entire trip, just trying to take it in because again, I'm looking to be present. I've just taken all this in. I know leadership is important, but I haven't really like, let me, all the notes I've written down, let me really try to digest this before I get back home and real life happens. I get to Chicago, Illinois, day two. I turn back on my phone and I get a text message from my sister. And the text message says, Call me back, it's urgent. So I begin to brace myself because in 2014, at this point, July 2014, it was either mom or dad. Mom was die, mom was diagnosed with uh depression and had attempted suicide before. Dad was diagnosed with prostate cancer. And so I called my sister back. Unfortunately, it ends up being dad. She says they found him unresponsive in the home. I know what that means. They won't tell me because I'm on the road, but I know what it means. I catch the first flight back home from Chicago, Illinois to uh Fort Lauderdale, Florida. My brother and his daughter, my niece, come to pick me up, and I hug my brother. I don't say a word. I hug my niece, Ayana, but I don't say a word. But I sit in the back seat with Ayana because I'm the youngest of 10. I've mentioned that already. I'm 25 years old at the time that this happens, and I never imagined I would lose my father this early. He wouldn't get to see me get married or have kids or even be successful in the business that I'm running now. But as I'm sitting and I'm watching out the window, Ayata says, Uncle, why did grandpa have to die? Why did grandpa have to die? That question rang in my ear as we got to my father's house. We were making funeral arrangements, it's a week-long process. And then August 9th, 2014, as we are at the funeral, I, Jew Charles, the youngest of ten children, am asked to give my father's eulogy. And it is in that moment that I realized leadership wasn't just about being in front. It isn't because that's what I always thought it was being a president, being the pastor, being this person that's in front of everybody. I never wanted to be a center of attention. But as I was preparing for the eulogy, I looked up the word lead, L-E-A-D. And in the dictionary simply means to guide a group of people along a journey. And that's all I've been doing. And here I am in this moment, the toughest moment of our lives. We we just lost the patriarch of our family, my father. And I'm being asked to lead my family through this process to tell his story, but to also make sure everything else goes smoothly. So that moment has helped guide me to where I am today. Because had I not had that moment, I wouldn't be walking away from video production. But I understand when I have that statement to lead and empower entrepreneurs to have relentless courage, I understand the moments in my life in my life where I've had to have relentless courage. And I could speak to that that experience clearly, right? But it's that moment that has led me to this today. I don't like having to lose my father, but what I often tell people is losing my father is what helped me understand my purpose in life. And so the power of these moments, the power of like it's it's to me, being when you're looking at being a good steward of where you're going next, you're looking at being a good steward of the mission and purpose that you have discovered in your life, just like you're moving to Bali. It doesn't happen without being intentional, being present, being in the moment to see okay, this hurts, this is painful, but is necessary to where I'm going next.

Yeah, and you know that the older I get, I literally just turned 44 um a week ago or almost a week ago. God, maybe two weeks ago. Anyway, very recently, August 28th, I turned 44. And um like I think there's like a the older I get, it's the willingness to allow for miracles in your life. And and and I define a miracle as an event that happens in time and space that causes an expansion in what we know to be possible. And and the biggest thing I had to give up, and I get to keep giving up inside of having a miraculous life, is not is knowing. Because I've someone who spent my whole life, dude, like wanting to know how things were gonna go, trying to get as much information as possible so I would have some sort of certainty and not, you know, and and it was all inside of a need to protect myself. The more I knew I thought of the more I could like avoid life. And and as you're sharing about that experience with your dad, and um, you know, like really, God knows why you turned your cell phone on in Chicago. You didn't have to, you could have kept it off, but you know, whatever called you to do that. Um it's like Soren Kierkegaard says life can only be understood in the rearview mirror, but it has to be lived moving forward, right? We can see the miracles in hindsight. It's in the rear view mirror mirror that we get to see those synchronicities. We don't necessarily see them in the moment when they're happening, but as you're as you're sharing that, and and you know, one of the things I wanted to talk to you about is like why storytelling? What is it about storytelling for human beings, right? We look back at history, we've always told stories. We passed our histories down orally through storytelling, and and and then when you're sharing about moments, and it's like that's that's how we lead each other is by you know, is by interpreting these moments that we have and then sharing those moments with other people as wisdom, as guidance, as you know, as just like being seen so that we can be seen in our experience as lived as human beings. Um but it's like that that willingness to to explore and expand and keep looking and not be attached to what it looks like and to have, you know, my my news book collaboration came out yesterday. In it, I talk about gratitude. And it's like um, you know, being able to be grateful for all of it, even the stuff, the stuff that doesn't go the way that you wanted it to, because you choose to frame life as like it's happening for me, it's unfolding for my greatest good. And I may not always know what that looks like in any given moment, right? I might have an idea, just like you were talking about, you are attached. And we do that, right? We invest a lot in a direction or a path or a business. And even when that thing is no longer serving us, we we clasp onto it because it's like, oh, what does it mean if I if I let go of that? You know, and and especially for those people who have successful businesses to like, you know, you people will keep doing that, even though it's making them ill and even, you know, physically ill and mentally ill and emotionally unwell and wreaking havoc in their relationships. People will keep doing those things because they're, you know, they've got some definition of success that they're operating under that tells them that, you know, it looks like a certain quality of life or a certain amount of money earned or what have you, or, you know, um, versus like, well, what if, you know, what if what it meant to live a successful life is that I get to keep creating my life in every moment of now, and that I I have the freedom to be able to keep asking and answering authentically, what do I want and how do I want to fulfill my purpose? Yeah.

You asked me um why storytelling, and I think it is because it's the clearest form of two things communication, and it's the clearest form of purpose. Um in communication, what a story is, because I think over time people have complicated the word story, story is a retelling of a very specific moment in time. That's it. When I told you about Mrs. Donnelly, my TV production teacher, handing me my first set of business cards, or uh uh the day that Keisha Dior called me to tell me she made a million dollars, or the day I found out my father died, and then the day I gave his eulogy and other things. It's like these are specific moments in time. What happens though, that I find fascinating, is something I was thinking about uh actually just yesterday when I was thinking about I saw the memes come out. So as we're recording this, the yesterday Apple released the Apple uh the iPhone 14. And there's memes coming out about it just being the phone from the previous year, the iPhone 13. But what I think it's fascinating is that the frame, although the frame of the phone does not change, the inside does. So we as human beings, as we're growing, yes, we grow in our arms and bodies, they become larger, but the frame never changes. Your eyes are still your eyes, your nose is still your nose, right? Like the frame of who you are in what you look like doesn't change. But based on the experiences, the moments, the very specific moments in time that you've gone through, that's what changes, and that's what makes you either more powerful or however you want to look at it, but the frame remains, and it's how you decide to frame it, like you mentioned. How do you how do you decide to frame that? But when you communicate those stories, like I communicated losing my dad to fulfilling my purpose or finding out my purpose. I didn't fulfill it yet, but to finding out my purpose, um that's how I chose to frame it. It's a horrible moment. It's I of course I had to grieve, and and and I'm still grieving. Like it's it's been eight years since I lost my dad, and I still cry on the day that he died. But how I choose to frame it is that I discovered my purpose. And I discovered that although I at first I used to say I didn't have a frame or a a way to lead, I didn't understand leadership. My dad was the leader. He was not only this, he was not only the center of our family, uh, with his wife and kids, he was the center of his siblings. He center, actually, now that I'm saying it out loud, he's the young, he's the middle child of seven, I believe. So he was always the center. He was always the person that people came to and asked for advice, or he was the person that took care of his siblings. Um, and so it's like I I I did have the view of what it meant to be a leader. And so I think why storytelling, it's because it's the thing that continues to guide us in communication, the way we speak to each other, but also in purpose. Because it's when you look back at those specific moments in time that you understand, oh, that's why that happened. You may not understand it in the moment, but later on you understand, okay, that's why that happened. Or, or here's what I learned from that, which again is a part of purpose. It's a lesson that you take with you now to do the next thing or to help the next person. When you're seeing someone who is struggling in entrepreneurship or you're just struggling in life in general, what you look to do when you have empathy is you look back onto your own experience and it's like, how can I help them? How can I support them? Even if it means a hug, you go back to that moment in time where you felt like you needed a hug in the moment that you were probably going through something similar, right? Storytelling is powerful in that way. It's not just about business. Now, it's powerful in business. People it's powerful in business because it helps you communicate a lesson. It's not just about buying an Apple Watch, it's about saving your life. It's not just about learning how to tell your story or living out your purpose, it's about relentless courage, right? It's not just about um with Southwest, they they mentioned that uh they want to help people save money and get to where they're going. I forget the exact statement, but they have a specific why statement. But then they also have this thing where it's say uh they have a heart on the bottom of every plane because it's more than just a machine. Right? It's those things that guide us. Stories are happening to us every single day. Every single day. It is the stories that guide us to the next moment.

Well, and you know, I I love what you're saying. I think as human beings, we resonate, right? We we resonate with other people's stories, with our own stories, with the sharing of stories. And so um, and uh the whole conversation around framing, it that's to me real freedom. Like the real freedom in life is when you can get to the place where you can get that it's actually a choice, how I frame the moments of my life, that there is actually, and we don't come into I I really do believe this. We don't come into life that way. We don't come into life being like, oh yeah, like I can choose how how I view money or my beliefs around my body or my beliefs around love and and relationships. And no, we come into this world with inherited views and inherited points of view and inherited frames and models for how to live life. And for many people, those those are like inherited by their loved ones and never questioned, because you know, that that level of awareness, I mean, it's not even happening consciously across the whole world today. So it's it's an emerging awareness that wow, like I could actually, there is no way that life is. Like, what if there was no way that life was or the world was or Jude or Amber was? Like, you know, yeah, we have adopted certain ways of being and habits as a function of repeated behaviors through life, but that doesn't mean that I'm this identity and that I'm nice and that I'm rebellious or that I'm driven. Like those are ways of being that I adopted in order to be able to survive and make it in life. And oh, you mean I don't have to be that way? Like I could choose to be some other way. Well, what would I choose then? Right. Like that to me is choice. And and when you can like you talk about because let's be honest, life is just billions and billions of moments. And then and then there's moments that we make significant.

Yeah.

And there's moments either because we participate in collective networks of conversations that tell us the death of a loved one, the death of a father or a mother are significant. So we should add significance to those moments because what it looks like to honor those ones, those people are to have those moments be significant in some way, or because for us in our own journey, we choose to bring significance to certain moments. And then we we make we shape our lives around the significance that we bring to some moments and not others. Most people do not make their daily trip to the grocery store significant. It's not a moment, right? Like we just choose not. And I mean, now, unless something really bad happens at the grocery store and then, you know, and it it's then we like repeat that moment on loudspeaker to anyone who will listen to us complain about the moment, right? That's also part of what we do as human beings. But um, but it's those like and the best storytellers, I think we were just like watching Lord of the Rings over the weekend. It was one of the things that my son wanted to do. And and um, you know, the best storytellers are the ones who can like create a series of moments that then just become this like embodying experience where you're just like even the steps that you're walking, right? Like, you know, I think about um, you know, the scene, and that based on your smile, Jude, I think you've you've probably seen Lord of the Rings. So um, you know, and for anyone listening, like who may who has or has not seen that movie, there's a scene where they're trying to get over this mountain, and it's like the mountain is coming down on them. And like, you know, the way Tolkien wrote it first, and then the way Peter Jackson experienced that, like cinema cinematography. How do you say that word? Because I'm cinematography. Yeah, the cinematography. Or cinematically. Cinematically, thank you, Jude. Cinematically. It's like every step they took was a moment that was significant. And it was just walking in stone, but it's like the way it was constructed made it significant. And to me, that's like, oh. And I can see that that's what you do for your clients, dude. And and so what I'm excited and what I'm enrolled in about you, because I'm coming into your life, we just met, you know, really in the last couple of months. So I'm coming into your life at a point where you're choosing to close a chapter, but it's like that, that storytelling, that way of connecting with people and connecting to people and connecting people inside of sharing their stories. I don't know exactly what is going to come next for you and exactly what you're gonna be doing, but I know that that will be part of whatever it is that you do do. And that is beautiful. And it's just, you know, the vehicle that you're doing that through is gonna change. And and that's that's awesome because that's that's growth. Right.

Yeah, I I I'm still shaping what that looks like. I know storytelling will be a part of it, but I think the biggest piece is leadership and storytelling. Um clear on that I want to do, I don't know how I'm going to do it yet. Um, but I want to create a private equity company um that specifically does leveraged buyouts. So what that means is you buy and sell companies. That's a very short end of it. But a big piece of that is executive coaching. So buying the business and then training up the executives within that business before I sell it. In order to be able to do that, to be an effective leader, in my opinion, storytelling has to be a part of it. Not only the ability to tell stories, but the ability to understand stories. Because when you're leading teams, unless you see things from a different perspective and you see things from what that person is coming, their experiences that they are coming from, you won't know how to lead them to where you're looking to take the company as a whole. Um, something that crystallized for me probably two weeks ago, I was doing a mentorship session with a creative. Um and something that crystallized for me is something I'm creating now, which is called a story bank journal. And what that simply is is if you deposit stories in this journal, then you can withdraw the stories. You'll know how to tell stories and understand stories later on. And I was walking through, I think, her core values and helping her understand like core values aren't just words, they are the moments in time that help you illustrate these words. So one of my core values is depth versus width or adventure. I like to tell a story about me skydiving, right? And so as an executive, how do you look at this mission or the goal that you have in the business to increase by 20%? How do you look at that as a story? What is the meaning that is brought to this that helps your team understand this is why we do what we do? Not just we're, yeah, we're gonna gain 20%. What does that 20% mean? How do you make meaning of that? Right for me, I want to play a bigger game. That's the bottom line. I have done video production, I've done it really well, but now I want a bigger seat at the table in order to impact more lives. If I am able to shape, to lead and empower the entrepreneurs and the leaders of these companies, they will then be better leaders for others, which will then create more leaders. I don't need to lead, you know, there's a bunch of people out there that talk about wanting to lead millions and all that. I don't need to lead. I just want to lead the the the best 1,000 leaders who will then go on to impact another thousand, who will then go on to I just want the I just want that. And I know if I do that right, I will have fulfilled and completed my mission. I'm literally, I started with 100 and I'm literally keeping track of who are the hundred people I'm influencing today that I speak to at least maybe once a week, twice a or once every other week. Um, who am I impacting? And how do I continue to help them understand what it means to have relentless courage? I'm very wide open about my life and all the experiences that I've had, so that it helps others to see how they can live this out on their own.

I I love what you're saying, and and I even heard another element to it, and it made me think of Mitch, who is the human being that introduced us to one another, who, you know, shout out to Mitch. We love you, you're incredible. And one of, you know, Mitch and I have been looking for ways to work together and kind of got put on hold for a bit, but it's still out there as a possibility. And it's one of those things that I know, like, you know, that it's like its time will come when the time is right for both of us. But like changing the network of conversations or the narrative about what it is to be CEO or a leader, right? And and because part of that existing paradigm of what it is to be a leader today is that you don't that you're not like telling your story, yeah. You're not being authentic or that there's a way that you're supposed to be in order to be a leader. And if you're not being that, then you're maybe you're being inappropriate. And I like to like the the the words that we're not allowed to say in business fear, love, shame, spirituality, you know, like expressing all of the parts of ourselves. And and when you when leaders are freed up to tell their stories authentically and to be authentic, like that really resonates with the people that they lead. And in and that's what we need more of. I think we need more humble leadership. I need more, we me need more people, more leaders that are willing to stand up as well and say, I don't have all of the answers, but I'm here to co-create with you and look for your partnership. And this is why, you know, to your point, this is why the 20% is important. And I don't actually know how to create the 20%, but I know that the 20% is important and it's important for this reason because we're gonna, you know, we're gonna serve these clients or we're gonna bring this product to this group or we're gonna impact these lives or whatever it is, right? Whatever the product, good or service that you're you're out to fulfill on in the world. And so, Jude, just thank you so much. Thank you for having the courage to live your values and operate congruently with who you say you are into the world and to be a demonstration of leadership for other people. Thank you for taking the time to come and be with me tonight and and you know, just speak about your journey. I'm so excited to watch what's next. And I I hope and I look forward to the time where maybe we get to work together in the future because, you know, uh I see a real opportunity in in for lots of people in in the steps that you're taking in terms of um like building those networks where we get to impact lives together in partnership with one another, which is really what I'm you know, looking to create in the world is I'm not gonna transform the world on my own. So who are the people that are coming onto my path so that I can, you know, really create the world inside of my commitment, which is that every human being gets to live a created life of their own design based on what they authentically want.

Yeah, and I thank you, I thank you for giving me the time and space to to talk about. I think this is the first of many conversations to come. I am I'm committed to this vision um because of the last 16 years of my life. And I think that one thing I've seen, this is the last thing I'll say before we had out. One thing I've seen are leaders who weren't asked to be leaders. They got really good at making money, but then they didn't understand what it meant to run a business. And after going through this journey of burnout and all these things, I've I've realized like my clients weren't necessarily hiring me to create video, they were hiring me to lead them. There was something they saw in me that I didn't understand even. They wanted to keep me because I've been a part of businesses and intimately a part of businesses, like in their day-to-day. Not because it was a part of what I do, but just because that's a part of my core value, depth versus width. But also like having that view of sitting on the sidelines and just seeing their business, seeing it from the lens that I get to see it from. One thing I'm very clear on is that they need more than just the ability to tell their story, they need the ability to lead with their story, to lead with dramatic clarity. And the clarity comes from understanding what your story means and how do you how do you give that shape towards the vision that you're looking to execute on? Um, I'm committed to that. And so, yeah, I would love to join you on your journey as you I know you're making a big transition as well to Bali to fulfill your purpose and your mission. And so, yeah, this is the first of many conversations to come.

Thank you so much for everyone listening to us and joining in on this conversation. You'll be able to connect with Jude and just track everything that he's up to in the show notes through his website and LinkedIn and all of those wonderful things. Um, you know, what are the stories that you're looking, you know, the moments, like what are the moments in your life that are the stories that you keep telling over and over again? And and why do you tell them? Like, what does the telling of those stories, like one of the things that I'm gonna be looking at coming out of this conversation with you, Jude, is like there are moments and stories that I tell over and over again. And what is it about those stories? Like, why are why those stories? What are, you know, what do they say about me and my life and what I'm committed to that has me keep repeating them over and over again? So thank you for that gift and that inquiry. And uh I look forward to the next time we speak. Thank you for being on the show.

Thank you, Amber.

Thank you so much for joining us for this week's episode. For more information on the show and our extraordinary guests, check out what would Amber Do.com.