With your host, Amber Howard, your weekly dose of guidance, inspiration, and strategies to have your small business and whole life thrive. We bring you incredible guests who share their real life experiences of being an entrepreneur so you can have your whole life work. Now, here's your host, Amber Howard.

Good morning and welcome back to What Would Amber Do? This morning, I'm really excited to be with my guest, Catherine Muller, who, after 18 years in the retail sales, and operations industry has recently transitioned to being an entrepreneur and starting a business as a grief transformation council coach and meditation teacher. Through the holistic healing community, Catherine's mission is to guide those who have lost a loved one to finding joy, happiness, and love again. Catherine is a coach, speaker, writer, and mom.

Yes.

And and Catherine, just you know, who you are for me is someone just so you have a massive commitment for healing and not just for people, but for the planet, for the earth. Yes. Yeah. So thank you so much for being here this morning.

Yes. Well, good morning. Yes, Ember. Thank you so much. I really am so I'm so honored and thankful for this opportunity to be able to not only be with you, but uh also share my story.

Yeah, well, why don't we jump right into that? Because I think you know, your story of feeling your own grief is the catalyst for you choosing to transition into being an entrepreneur. So why don't why don't you share a little bit about your journey, you know, after Dodd and your partner in 2016?

Yes, absolutely. So yeah, so John, just over four years ago, he passed away in March of 2016, and and it and it was sudden. So it wasn't expected. And at the time, uh, you know, obviously, when anyone loses anybody, um, you know, there's a moment where it is very difficult to process or understand what's happening in the moment. And so the person who I was at that point in time, uh about three weeks after he had passed, I decided to go back to work, believing that if I had gone back to work, it would be a good distraction to avoid having to feel the pain and the sadness. And so that's what I did. And probably about two and a half or three months in, um, and this was now the third time that I realized, okay, this is the third time this is happening. This is not good. And what happened was I had I drove out to Hamilton to one of my stores, and you know, it's about an hour drive, so it's a good amount of time to myself in the car. And I remember being triggered by a song that had come on. And just as that song finished playing, I arrived at the store and you know, I I couldn't, I couldn't go in. I had to, I sat in the parking lot and just cried my eyes out for a good solid hour. And in realizing that there was so much that I was holding in me and I could no longer hold it in, that's when I decided, okay, this is I need to get help. I I need to help myself. And so I need to take some time off and actually allow myself to grieve. And, you know, there was this fear of, you know, feeling the pain. I did not want to feel the pain. And the reason why I say that is because for a good portion of my life, I started to see that I had that's how I had lived my life. I'm gonna truck through things, I don't feel anything, I don't cry, you know, I'm always gonna have this face on, I'm strong. Uh, you know, being vulnerable meant being weakness. So there were all these different things, like layers upon layers, that I I told myself to say, hey, you know what? I I don't want to feel any of this. And that day, realizing, okay, Catherine, you know what, I can't continue down that path because it's not working. That's when I decided, okay, it's time to figure it out. I need to, I I gotta heal, I gotta figure this out. So took the time off, go to see the doctor, now seeing a therapist. And, you know, when I saw the therapist, the very one of the very first questions I asked her was, okay, I like who else can I talk to? What else can I read? What do I need to know so I can figure out how to get this over and done with in like 30 days, 60 days, 90 days? Okay, I was still on this, I've got a timeline and I'm I'm giving myself this amount of time to get over this. And, you know, she had said to me, she just, you know, it was the look on her face when I had asked the question, and she looked at me dead straight in the eyes and said, Well, Catherine, it doesn't work like that. And you know, the gravity of her words sunk so deep in my heart that I was like, what? What do you mean? And I broke down crying. Anyways, I left the appointment. I still had it that I was gonna figure it out. I'm like, no, no, I'm gonna figure this out, I'm gonna understand this. Because what was also happening with the with my my appointments with the doctor and therapist was the immediate um one of the solutions was to I'm gonna give you sleeping pills so you can sleep. I'm gonna give you some antidepressants. And for me, that it didn't resonate. And I really had had it that there was a way that I could heal myself through my mind, body, and soul to really understand, okay, this is what I'm going through, and this is these those, this is how I'm gonna get there. I had no idea what that was, but I just I just knew I was gonna figure it out. So then became over time, it was okay. So, what are some of the things that I need to do for my body? All right, well, I do already know that exercise is great. Okay, so what are some of the things that I have been doing or not doing? So looking at what my regimen was from a physical aspect. All right, so the first thing that I'm gonna do is I'm just gonna go for a walk. That's gonna help, you know, my body just naturally produce, you know, the all the feel-good uh chemicals. So let's just start with that. And then when it came to the mental and emotional, and which is where you and I had met, that's when I decided to take the landmark forum. And, you know, taking that forum was one of the best decisions I could have done for myself. One for not what I only began to discover, but number two was because of the community of people then that I started to have around me to support me on my healing journey. And these were people such as yourself that would just say, Katherine, hold on, where are you going? What path are you going down? And so that it would keep me, help keep me on track. So that was another aspect to my healing journey that was so important and integral. Then for the spiritual aspect, I had at that time I had already been dabbling in meditation, uh, but it wasn't a consistent practice. So then what happened is I, one of my mentors who also became um who's my spiritual teacher, I then started to see him on a weekly basis on Sundays, and we would spend time together. And then that's where I began to deepen my spirituality and the practice of meditation and the benefits of that. So, in combination all with all of those things, yeah, it wasn't an overnight okay. It wasn't, you know, three months from now. It was it was years. And and it still continues. I still incorporate all of those practices because I've seen the difference that it's made in my life and really becoming present to myself and how and being present with others. And then the biggest thing was also my self-awareness. Uh and so what I mean by that was I saw and I remember that weekend at the landmark forum, and it was on the Sunday, and I that's when I had my my biggest breakthrough. And my break, my my breakthrough was discovering the guilt that I was real actually feeling for, you know, all the things that I said and that I didn't do with John. You know, we go, we go through that, you know, I could have, I should have, or, you know, maybe if I hadn't gone to work that day, I could have saved that, you know, it was all of that, but not only just in that experience with him, but the guilt of who I really saw, who I was being, and how my ego was on, it was just running things on autopilot with all of my relationships in all of all areas of my life prior to that. And so I thought, oh my goodness, like okay. It was like, uh, what have I done? What have I been doing? And so now it was, it wasn't even just the fear of looking at or or feeling the sadness and the pain, but then now it was like, whoa, Catherine, here's a mirror. And this is who you've been being for the last 20, 30 years. And it was a huge, like, like a mic drop for me where I was like, okay, well, Catherine, this is now what's happening. You're realizing that what you have been doing before, okay, yes, it was great because it got you so far, but it's not gonna help you now going forward. So, what are you gonna choose to do now to make a difference for yourself and others in in your life? What are the things you gotta clear? What are the things you gotta take care of now because because this is what you've realized you you've been doing?

So so much of what you're saying is gold, Catherine, but I just wanted to dial in on you know, one of the two of the things that you said really stood out for me. So one was like that loss of control. Yes, right, when when John died, you know, and you had that like you know, immediately it's like that need to try and control things, right? I can't control the pain, I can't, you know, I can't control what happened, and I didn't want what happened, but what else can I control? And I think that that um is very very common, not just in Greek, but just in life, right? We when any time, and and as business owners, you know, one, just thank you so much for sharing all of that with us because I I know you know we're we are friends and I know that this has been quite a journey for you as you've gone through this, and and just I I'm so in awe of you that you're now choosing to turn this around in order to be of service and make a difference for other people with you know sharing what what you've gone through. But that that need to control things and try and you know solve for uncertainty, protect ourselves from uncertainty, like like that's somehow possible, right? Like and it's just really um it's it's very relatable. Yeah I think it's something that we we often all of us go through and and have to confront at different points in our time. And then the other thing I really you trusting your intuition. Yes, you know, and and how important like I've been discovering on my journey as an entrepreneur. Yeah, there's so many different points of view, opinions. Oh, you should do this marketing tool, you should do that. This is how you reach your target audience. Like, I'm like just like who do I want to be a business? How do I want to serve people? How do I want to engage with my clients, my customers? What are the kind of relationships I want to have with people and learning to trust myself? And that can be in and of itself confronting, especially if you're if you're new and I know you are a new entrepreneur. Um but this conversation about grief and healing from grief, and you know, you care free with yourself, you had to go through that process. You couldn't just like put it on a shelf and be like, okay, but what have you seen, you know, through your experiences as the impact on people when they don't process grief?

Yes. So when I began to share my story uh with others, um what I found was, you know, and I I I was in disbelief at some of the things that I was hearing. And these were individuals who, whether it was a partner, um, you know, a child, a sibling, these were individuals who we're talking five years, 10 years, 20 years, 30 years down the road that had not processed their grief um or come face to face with it. And in the moment that it had happened, made a decision I can't move forward, I can't love again, I don't know how I'm gonna move forward. And they just chose to not live life. And what they chose then to do instead was to sit in the sadness, in the sorrow, and the mourning of it, and the loss. And seeing how these people, especially there's there's one person I remember um a gentleman in particular, I don't remember his name because it was quite some time ago, but what I I remember how I felt with him when he was sharing his story, he had lost his daughter and um you know, had been 30 years, you know, he's you know, probably in his early 60s. And to see, you know, his energy, the life just gone. Um, I just thought it could broke my heart to see that there are people out there living this way, not living life, not living their full potential, because there's this loss that they've experienced, and then they created a story around it that there was no more life to live. There was no more going on. And this was someone who, you know, obviously in a marriage, because of the loss, now separated and divorced, and you know, unable to have fulfilling relationships, loving relationships with anybody, living in isolation, feeling alone. And I just thought, you know, and that's one person. And, you know, think of all the many people who have chosen that path because of what they experienced. And so in having these conversations, you know, then that's when, you know, I didn't know it at the time that that's what I wanted to do, but there was something in me that was pulling me in that direction. And I thought, oh my goodness, like I just can't believe it. So I remember from having those conversations, that's when I also had the Resilience Forum, which was um, you know, an opportunity, it was a place for people to come together, those who had just recently gone through, you know, a difficulty or challenge in their life, whether it be loss, uh divorce, a job loss, what have you, and then connect with those who had already overcome and living life and to see that it is possible to still live a life of joy and happiness and bliss. You know, it's just understanding how to transmute those emotions of pain and sadness. And what I found that was common in the people that I was speaking to was one, um, they didn't realize that they were in a grieving process in the grieving process or had not allowed themselves to grieve. One, because it wasn't something that was talked about in the family and they didn't have the support system around them to understand what that was. And then the other thing was, you know, for those who understood that they were grieving, there was still this gap, this disconnect of, well, what can I do? And, you know, for a lot of them was, well, I went to the doctor and I went to the therapist, and yes, I took medication for depression or an anxiety or this and that. But they hadn't looked at what what they could do holistically, you know, and we have, and I think this is, you know, it's one of the things is that we a lot of people often forget is how intelligent our bodies are. Okay, how intelligent uh our bodies are in healing, in showing us that we need to pay attention and look at something. So let's say, for example, we've got we've got a pain in our back. There's this gnawing pain we've had, our kink that we've had in our neck for however long. You know, we we feel these aches and pains in our bodies, and you know, right away we dismiss it, do, oh, it's this, it's that, you know, but we don't dig deeper that there may be something psychologically, mentally, emotionally that we're holding that we haven't looked at, and now our body, we've suppressed it, and so now it's manifesting in other ways physically. So, and because you know, as I shared, uh, you know, when I was with the therapist and the doctor, and their their first go-to was, okay, you know, take um, I'm gonna give you some sleeping pills, I'm gonna give you antidepressants, and inside me, intuitively, as you said, you know, it didn't sit well with me. And so as I started looking into different modalities, different teachings, so you know, um, one of them was Ayurveda, understanding the doshas and uh the chakra hindra system, understanding the energy centers within our body and how that moves and how we affect that. So once I started learning about those different modalities, then I started to have a better understanding of uh my physical form and the things that I could do to help heal. And meditation was one of the biggest things that had me really understand how to ground myself, how to center, how to calm and relax. Uh, because within meditation, there's also a lot of breath work that's involved. And, you know, we don't realize that even just with our breath, you know, most of us, if not all of us, you know, we breathe from our chest. And then I learned is we actually need to breathe through our stomach, because that's where we get the fullness of the of the air that we that we breathe in to move through the cells, like into the bloodstream and throughout our body to fully like to have our bodies fully, that's the word that I'm looking for, um function, to fully function where it optimally. And you know, that's just from your breath. That's just from breathing. I mean, and I just only reason, you know, just learned that a few years ago.

And you know, seeing I remember, I remember calling you when I discovered breathing. Like, I was just like, oh, like, and that was for me only a few months ago. Like, I don't think I've ever really intentionally thrown the, you know, breathed my whole life. Right. So exactly. It's like just interesting the things that we don't know. And I love what you said about like it the that it pulled you forward. Right. And this is something that I've heard recently from a number of different people. It's like, you know, so often in life we're trying force outcomes, like in our business, in our relationships. It's like we're trying to get somewhere. And what I've learned is when you're really on like aligned with your purpose, it that pulls you like forward. You don't, you know, like and you're listening to your intuition, the actions to take, who to, you know, what to do, you know, whatever is sourceful for you, you know, whether it's universe God, your spiritual belief system, whatever that is, you know, it's like listening to your intuition is is allowing those downloads to come to you. And that requires it's been a real wake-up call for me in terms of meditation and being quiet, which is like you know, from our friendship, not things that I, you know, did a lot because I was just too busy going and doing. Uh and but the more I and the more I allow myself to sit in quiet and stillness and listen, I find the better my ideas are. And it's 100% for sure.

And you know, uh, you know, it's I actually just had this conversation yesterday with a friend of mine, and you she had it when I was, you know, because we hadn't spoken for for probably a good year. And so we had a lot to catch up on. And she said, Wow, it just sounds like you just got it. And I said, No, no, no, hold on a second. It wasn't uh an overnight thing, or like, hey, in a week, this is what I discovered. It was a lot of trial and error. So yes, even though I knew intuitively like this is where it was pulling me, I had still was in that, I still had that paradigm of okay, of control. And you know, I had tried so many different things. And when I was, I remember when I had realized, okay, why am I still like I'm doing all these different things? And I'm gonna give you an example. It's like, okay, you know, real estate. I, you know, went and got the course, and I'm like thinking, okay, yeah, this would be great. I'm gonna make a lot of money. I'm good at great uh connecting with people. And then I'm doing the course, and you know, again, the intuition comes in, and I'm and I'm like, no, this is not what I would want to wake up knowing that I get to do. I'm not feeling the passion or the love. I know I'm gonna be great at it. I know I'm gonna be really good at it because I've got a lot of transferable skills, but it's not what uh would get me lit up and wanting to wake up and jump out of bed in the morning, right?

And so there was also a number of those calls over the years, right? I mean, I'd be like, you know, and and I think I I had a conversation with another, you know, person that I was coaching last night, and she's known for a while now that she's so you know, her purpose is to be supporting women in the Muslim community and creating safe spaces for them to communicate.

Wow.

And you know, she just hasn't been listening. And I'm like, so how long are you gonna keep being rebellious? You've been getting the messages, you've been told, you know what there is for you to do, and you want to be right that you don't know how. Well, the how is none of your business. But I remember like many conversations with you being like, okay, body, you're gonna go do that. And what about this? What about that? Right. So yeah. Yes, what for anyone listening who is either you know in the same place, who's just recently made this transition, or they're like, you know, I really would like to own my own business. What are some of the tools, resources, or people that have made a difference for you as you've gone? You know, because to leave two decades of a career, you know, and like step into something very new, even though you have experience coaching and and mentoring people and all of that to write your various different roles, but you know, this is a a big transition for you. What's made a difference for you on that journey?

Oh goodness. I I honestly I would say the people that I I chose to have around me, um, that has made the biggest difference. And you know, you you mentioned it earlier where yes, you're gonna have many different perspectives, you're gonna have many different people saying all of these different things. And yes, I have many of those in my life in my in my circle. However, there are a select few, you being one of them, where there is in the way, you know, in the way that you show your love, the way you supported me, the way you hold me account have hold not just me, but people accountable and responsible. I always knew that the place that you were coming from and what you were saying was exactly what I needed to hear wholly and completely. That there wasn't uh something behind it muddling it or uh like an enabling. And so that being said, was also being very uh I don't know if discipline is exactly the word, but it's the word that's just coming to mind right now, being very disciplined uh or discerning. The very discerning is the word I would use. I love that word. Yes, right, discerning of how much time am I spending in conversation with other people who enable certain behaviors that are actually not in the best interest of my highest self. So I can literally count maybe three people. It's not a lot of people, but three people specifically that I will only have conversations with because I know that in having those conversations, however short or however long it is, it is exactly what I need because it keeps me on that path to my highest, to to live the embodiment of my highest self. And in the last several months, especially in having made this transition, um there were people that I had to speak to and say, you know, uh, no, I can't come to your event. No, I'm not able to come to your workshop, no, we're not gonna hang out, and this is just what we're gonna do for three hours or whatever it be. Yes, I I I would love to, but you know, these are my focuses. And so it was really getting very clear on also what my daily activities were, where I was spending my time, how I was spending my time and tweaking it. So I was giving myself two weeks. So one week would be an implementation of, okay, these are the actions I need to take. And then the second week would be, okay, you know, I'm doing it, all right, okay, seeing what's working, seeing what's not working. Towards the end of that second week, then, okay, where is it that I need to tweak and what is it that I need to pivot? And the moment I would get clear on, okay, this is what I need to tweak, this is what I need to pivot, I realize now where I was in my zone of genius or my zone of excellence. This is how much I produced, this is the energy level I had the entire day. That's where I will know I need to stay because that's where I'm having the most impact, not just for myself, but then for the people that I'm helping. Okay, what were the activities then that then took me out? And usually that's when I know I have to do a spreadsheet, when I have to do some of the back-end stuff. Those are the things that I realize, okay, you know, that it's not my zone of genius or my zone of excellence. But seeing that, okay, now what are the systems that I need to put in place to then help me either automate or delegate out? So this way I'm not taking myself out for hours at a time. And now my creativity levels have just dropped. Um so look, yeah, so the community of people, um, you're scheduling how you're spending your time on a daily basis and a weekly basis, setting a structure where you are not where you're tweaking and you're pivoting sooner rather than later. Um what else can I share? And and also, you know, my morning routines, uh, you know, I can't say enough how important it is to start your day before you start your day. So I my mornings usually are about three to four hours long to myself. So I'm getting up at about five, six o'clock, and I'm going into a meditation, I'm doing my workout, I'm having my breakfast, I'm going for a walk, you know, it's really just time for myself. I'm journaling. So all of those things, and it's and I'm not rushing it. Okay. And I've given myself that time and I choose to wake up early enough to have that time for myself because the impact of taking care of me first, I can I can do so much more now when I'm actually starting my day, quote unquote, and being able to be 110%. Because now what I've done is I filled my cup. I filled my cup so much so now that it's overflowing. So now I'm able to give to others throughout my day. And then that's where my energy levels and my output is just they're at a they're at a maximum. And so when I when I'm performing that way, when I'm having that type of productivity, you know, I just get so much from that. And then it's just like a rinse and repeat, and then I just repeat the same process. Now, am I saying it's always like that every single day? It is most days, but some days not, and that's okay. And that's where also learning to have compassion for yourself and allowing your again, listening to your body, listening to your, you know, really listening to your intuition and what it's telling you that, you know, okay, Catherine, you maybe just need to lie here and just rest for a little bit longer, and then you know what you'll get started with your day. You know what you need to shift, you can do that too. So also having compassion for yourself and not being hard on the things that you're not doing is also super important. And having those daily practice consistently, um, you know, for for some, I, you know, been in conversations like, oh, that's so hard, so difficult. But oh, there's the kids, and oh, there's this, and oh, there's that. And you know, I was there once too, but I've also seen the impact of not having those things in place where I was getting sick, I was feeling so stressed out, um, I'm, you know, have no patience, you know, I'm short. And it's, you know, all of those things don't they they don't serve anybody. They certainly don't serve me, and they don't certainly don't serve anyone within my sphere. So um being that be having those disciplines, sticking to it and staying with it are super important. And going back to, you know, in terms of the community people that you have around you, the conversations that I had, here's the thing: people who really love you and support you, they're gonna give you that space and they're gonna understand and say, you know what, Catherine, do your thing. I got you no matter what. Awesome. And there are gonna be some that are just gonna have like have no understanding and no idea and be like, hey, well, you know, we used to go out all the time, we used to go to the bar, we used to go to the club, we used to do this and that. Those people will fall away. And it doesn't mean, you know, there's anything bad or good. It's I I still love them, they know that it's just where I am right now and in the direction that I'm going with going in. If it doesn't fit, it's not aligned. And you only want people who are going to, you know, help be like, you know, when you look at building that foundation to have have be a strong foundation for you. Because when you are up to things that are so much bigger than you or me, we need that in place in order to be able to do all the things powerfully for others and have that impact in the world, other than just for ourselves.

Yeah, again, you said so many good things in there. You know, I think I what I'm hearing, and and I really do believe this has been my big transformation over the life like since COVID is it starts with like getting clear about what you want. And and there's so and and this is so critical as as business owners, as human beings, like to just be clear about what we want and ask for what we want. And so often that that's looked upon as being selfish. It's like a famous and and it's like I I love one of my clients this week. We were talking, and I said, What do you want to be acknowledged for this week? And he goes, I want to be acknowledged for doing what I wanted all week. And and what's beautiful about that is his business expanded that week, his relationship with his wife and kid expanded that week. Every area of his life is self-care expanded. So it's like when you do what you want in life, everyone around you wins. And that that message is so counterintuitive because it's not the agreement reality that we live in. We're trying that we're supposed to like do what you know, our duty or do what we should do for other people. And uh I love what you said, and you know, a fellow uh someone who I interviewed a couple of weeks ago on the podcast, like Katina also says the same thing. We should be overflow, and that was not how I made my life for most of my life, up until I would say even six months ago. Yeah, it was like you know, shoulds and I'm shouldn't myself get and what I should do and have to do, and and all of that stuff. So I think it really is brilliant, and you know, I'm honored to be one of the people who've been able to support you on this journey. And I think that, you know, I call it building my Jedi Council. Yeah, oh, I love that. You know what I mean? It's always gotta be a little cheeky, right? Um, but it's like you are those people who you are, you know, you don't want to surrender to anyone, you know, and you do want to have a handful of people who you look to who you know that they have your best interests, and and they're they've been brought to you. And that that's gonna evolve and change over time. Oh, I think I mean as you move to different spaces and you know, um, and I I love the this woman I I used to work with at the airport years ago, and she said, like on the topic of people, you know, shifting in and out of your life, she goes, you know, you just start vibrating at like harmonizing, like music at a different frequency. And I didn't really get that at the time because I didn't know the whole world of energy and and all of that stuff. But she goes, you literally just stop harmonizing at the same frequency, and then it just doesn't serve either person for you to be in the relationship anymore. And you don't have to, like you said, you don't have to do anything about it or have like drama around it. Right. The relationships just kind of fall off. And I you know, even beyond that, there is this. I did this workshop with Vision from Mind Valley, a masterclass a couple weeks ago, and he talked about as you move through different levels of awareness, that there's this beautiful destruction that happens. And it's like, you know, and he said it was a gentle removing. I don't know if it's always gentle, but you know, I'm like, I I agree. I agree. I may not always feel like it's gentle, but you know, that the God, the universe, whatever is sourceful to you, is gonna strip away everything that doesn't serve you on fulfilling on your purpose. And and I can see that in my life, and and you know, I'm every one of us is here is on our own journey. And and I think, but to bring it back to to what you do and the and the value that you bring, there is so much power in completion. Yes, and and you know, being able to go through and and deal with. And for some people, I'm reminded of this gentleman I met in in a I was um volunteering or assisting in a landmark forum, and then there was this gentleman who shared that weekend he had his infant childhood died, and he, you know, he was in his 60s now, so this happened like 40 years before, and he got on the call to go to the to the hospital and identify his daughter, and he got there and she was lying on the table, and he was just like probably in so much shock, he didn't touch her. Wow, and for 40 years he hated it, like he carried her on such shame and disgusted, like that in that moment that he didn't actually touch her, and you know, whatever that response was, that automatic response or like avoidance or whatever, but she carried that for 40 years.

So I can you imagine? Like for I can't imagine, but it it it's it's real a reality that happens.

Yeah, we do that, right? And so for for anyone listening to this conversation, you know, the value of working with someone like Catherine is that you get to bring completion to things. And and in that process of completing your grief, and it doesn't even have to be over the loss of life, it could be the loss of a significant relationship or the loss of a business, you know, like you're you want to create a new business and you're you're incomplete about something that happened in your your career earlier on. I think there's there's just it creates the ability to go forward from nothing. And uh, you know, I'm so grateful that you are out there in the world doing this. I know you have a book coming out in the spring of 2021 called Journey After John.

Yes, yes, yes. I'm yes, I'm so excited. You know, I um, you know, there's some revisions of whatnot that still have to be completed, and that's okay. But I, you know, as I was writing this book, I think one of my biggest um aha moments was I I not only wanted to share my story or have it be a memoir, um, but I also wanted it to serve as a resource and a tool for you know individuals who are going through their grieving process and on their healing journey, understanding what is grief, what does it look like, what does it feel like, what does it sound like, and hey, here are some things that you can use that I've used that have helped me heal along the way. And you can heal yourself, you can move forward, you can fill that void, you can find love to love again. And the moment that I I that I felt that and said, this is how this book is going to serve people, you know, beyond my lifetime, that's when I it clicked. Oh my goodness, Catherine, this is what you should just be doing. This is this is it. And then that's when all then the wheels, like, you know, that snowball effect where it just, you know, then that's when I decided, okay, I'm transitioning out of retail now. I'm launching my business. And that literally all happened within the last couple months. And it was just, as you said, that clarity. Yes, I had always had this knowing, and there was my intuition pulling me, but I hadn't had that clarity of this is it. And when I had when I was in the process of writing that book and I saw how I wanted to serve, so it was making the switch of it was making the switch of yes, this is why I'm doing it, and you know, I want to do it because, you know, everyone wants, you know, most people want to write a book and there's that calling. But once I made it not about me, but about the world, the people out there, when I made it about when it became that this is how I'm going to serve humanity, it was like, oh, this opening. It was like this floodgate of this is it, this is the direction, this is my why, this is my mission. This is now, this is these are all the visions, all the things that I've been seeing coming together. This is what I've been seeing. And so uh yeah, I'm super excited uh from when the book comes out. I'm also excited for all the many different things that have been unfolding in the last, in the last little while. And as you said, the people, the people that are now that I've just been connecting with, um just, I mean, it's I've been having so many beautiful experiences. I'm so excited for what's to come and continuing to unfold. And I do have to say, one of the biggest things too in my in the transition was also I had to have a mindset shift around um money. That has that was a big thing because I had, you know, 20 years, always received a paycheck. That was how I understood the exchange, the energy exchange of money. And there was this fear of like, oh my goodness, well, what am I gonna do if you know, if I, you know, I leave and now I I have to create it. And understanding, again, we have this power to heal ourselves. We also have the power to create. We are the creators of our reality. So, Catherine, get out of your own way and realize that you are doing it, you can do it. So, trusting, surrendering, and allowing. So, not always having to know, trusting the uncertain. I don't need to know what's gonna happen tomorrow. I just need to know what needs to happen right now. What is the one action I need to take right now that is going to propel me in the trajectory of the vision that I'm holding for the for all these people in this world?

You know, I think it's so perfect that you say that, right, Catherine, because and we we're not taught about money, that money is energy. And and and I think so many people, you know, we we get up until whenever we stop inside of that, you know, we get a paycheck, and it's like, well, that's the amount of money we live within within, versus like that's one of the ways that money flows to you is through that company. It's right, it's not the only way money could flow to you. And we and often we don't even ask for more than we get in that paycheck because that's our relationship to money. And I, you know, we could talk about this forever, and I definitely will be having you back on the show. And I think, you know, there's there's an opportunity to discuss, you know, even have a whole conversation just about minds that are on money. And I do want to leave people with this. Like you, and and I remember our conversation with you a few months back where you were really stopped in the book, and and it's this message of purpose over perfection. People need what you have to say today. And it's like, you know, you're gonna keep evolving your business over time. It's you know, whatever you create now, you may look back at it 20 years from now and be like, wow, okay. And I've talked about the entrepreneurs like those are the videos I recorded even this podcast. I mean, I won care. Like, but who knows? Like the next time, five more times, you know, we're gonna we're in this for a lifetime, as far as I'm concerned. You know, when when you and I have future conversations, but it's like people need to hear what you have to say. And so I just really acknowledge you for jumping in and and for listening and giving up the resistance and and the needing to know how.

Yes, the needing to know how.

Jumping in, jumping into the pool and and really trusting yourself. And and thank you for who you are. Thank you for the legacy of healing and love that you've committed to leaving and on this planet for people. And uh thank you for being on the show this morning.

Yes, thank you so much, Amber. Uh, this is a great, great start to my day. Thank you for being in such a wonderful conversation with you, and thank you for all you do. Uh, thank you, thank you for who you are in the world and who you've been for me as well.

You're so welcome. All right, thank you everyone for tuning into the show this morning. We'll be back next week and have an incredible day.

Thank you so much for joining us for this week's episode. For show info, visit what would Amber Do.com. And for information about Amber Howard and Associates' offerings and services, visit Amber Howard Inc.com.